Awesome Contest Entry

This story was emailed to me today. It is fab!! Please send in your stories. We are waiting!!

Hey fellow druggies,

I've got a couple good stories just in the short time I've been a pharmacist, but this is my favorite. It's a long read because this woman (and her husband) are just f'ing crazy insane. Apologize in advance for the wall of text:

At our pharmacy, we have a married couple, let’s call them Jack and Jill, as our patients. Jill had been coming to our pharmacy for several years, at least since I interned there (I graduated last year, and became manager a few months after getting my license). We knew that she had been asked not to return to another pharmacy in our chain, as well as the RiteAid across the parking lot from our pharmacy. We never really heard from Jack apart from a prescription here and there for him, but Jill was always in the store, either shopping or picking up her prescriptions. Aside from several instances of cutting in line (are we in Kindergarten again?) and failure to pick up medications within our 2-week window, we really didn’t have a problem with this couple. Until several months ago.
Like I said, Jill had a problem picking up medications on time. Our store had an automated messaging service that would call patients at 7 and 10 days after being filled letting them know that their medications were waiting and would be put back to stock if they weren’t picked up on a certain date. After quite a few times of putting Jill’s prescriptions away only to have her come in the next day demanding that we get her prescriptions ready right away because she called them in two weeks ago, one of my technicians personally called Jill right before she put her medication back to stock to see if she still wanted the medication. I don’t know how the conversation proceeded, but it ended up with Jill yelling and cursing at the technician. This was on a Saturday.
On Monday when I came into work, Jill called and asked to speak to the manager. I answered the phone politely and asked how I could help her. She immediately launched into a tirade about how long we wait before we put prescriptions back. I explained to her our procedure, and then she started going crazy.
“Well, Alice called me this weekend and THREATENED ME!” Jill screeched.
“Jill, Alice didn’t work this weekend. Are you sure that’s who you spoke to?” I said.
“YES! SHE THREATENED ME AND I DON’T LIKE IT!”
“Jill, I don’t believe anyone would threaten you about putting your medication back into stock,” I calmly replied.
This is where it gets bizarre. I begin to hear a man screaming in the background, “JILL! GIVE ME THE DAMN PHONE! GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE! GIVE ME THE PHONE!” I heard a scuffling sound, which I believe was Jack and Jill fighting over the phone.
Silence.
“I’m sorry about that sir. My name is Jack, Jill’s husband. Can you please tell me how long it is you wait until you put your medications back into stock?” this new voice said to me.
“Fourteen days. We have already explained this to Jill. Multiple times.”
“Ok, I understand that. But I don’t like that your technician threatened my wife.”
“Sir, I really do not believe that my technician threatened your wife. She would have no reason to do so.”
“OH?! SO YOU’RE CALLING MY WIFE A LIAR?!”
At this point I began to hear Jill screaming in the background, “JACK! GIVE ME THE PHONE! YOU STOLE THE PHONE FROM MEGIVEMETHEPHONENOWGIVEMETHEPHONE!!”
Another scuffle occurred in the background.
“Listen, I want to tell you something,” Jill yelled into the receiver.
“No, Jill, I know we’ve had this conversation before. You have 14 days to pick up your prescription.”
“WILL YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME?!”
“What?” I replied knowing I wouldn’t like the answer.
“YOUR TECHNICIAN THREATENED MY LIFE AND…”
“Jill, this conversation is over unless you can speak to me in a rational tone.”
“…I DO NOT APPRECIATE BEING THREATENED AND HOW DARE YOU PUT MY…”
“Good-bye, Jill,” I said as I hung up. I proceeded to tell everyone in the pharmacy that if she called back to immediately give the phone to me.
Not five minutes passed when the phone rang. I answered it, “Thanks for calling, how can I help you?”
“Listen, I’m sorry for the way my wife spoke to you, but I just want to make everything clear,” Jack said in a calm voice.
In the background I could hear Jill screaming, “GET OFF THE PHONE! GIVE ME THE PHONE! HE HUNG UP ON ME! IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!”
Ignoring the screaming in the background, I said, “Jack, this conversation is done. We’ve told you both before. You have 14 days to pick up the prescriptions. This seems to be a problem with you guys every month.”
“I HAVE NEVER CALLED YOU BEFORE IN MY LIFE! YOU’RE A LIAR AND I’M GOING TO COME DOWN TO THE PHARMACY AND SCREAM AT YOU IN FRONT OF ALL YOUR EMPLOYEES AND CUSTOMERS!”
“Jack, if you step foot into the pharmacy, I will call the police.” And I hung up.
The phone rang immediately. “Thanks for calling, how can I help you?” I answered as calmly as I could. My blood pressure was through the roof and I could feel my hands shaking.
It was Jill, “HOW DARE YOU HANG UP ON ME…”
“I’m done with this, stop calling. I’m putting a call into my district manager, do NOT call this store again until you hear from either myself or someone higher than me.” *click*
Now, I’m pretty sure based on Jill’s prescription history that she has severe bipolar disease. I’m almost positive based on Jack’s behavior that he also has severe bipolar disease. For a few weeks, we heard nothing from either of them, and I prayed that it was the last time there would be an ordeal like this one. I was wrong. Very wrong.
One of my pharmacists was on vacation. I worked the day shift, and a floater came in to cover the evening. Just as I was getting ready to walk out the door, someone called the pharmacy. One of the technicians answered.
“Thanks for calling? How can I help you?” …. “Well, right now, the only pharmacist we have here is Anna.” …. “No, Sharon’s not working.” …. “No, he’s not working either.” …. “Ok, I’ll put you on with Anna, hold on.”
Hearing the exchange, I hung back in the pharmacy to see what was going on. The technician had this horrified expression on her face, “That’s Jill, and she wants to talk to a pharmacist.”
Anna, being a brave soul, took the call. “Can I help you?” …. “No, I’m the only pharmacist here.” …. “Ma’am, I AM a pharmacist, I can help you with what you need.” …. “Can you please hold a second?”
“She absolutely refuses to talk to me and says she doesn’t want to give some stranger her information,” said Anna.
“Fine, I’ll take it.” I took a deep breath and picked up the phone, “Jill, this is Tom, what’s going-“
“JILL YOU GET OFF THE PHONE THIS MINUTE!”
“SHUT UP JACK I’M TRYING TO TALK TO THE PHARMACIST! DON’T YOU DARE TAKE THE PHONE OFF ME!”
I hung up the phone. “Listen,” I said to everyone in the pharmacy, “if she calls back, tell her to stop calling tonight and I will deal with her in the morning.” Everyone agreed, and I went home and tried to forget about it.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the best move I had ever made. When I came in the next day, the technician who worked the evening gave me the story of all that had occurred last night. Apparently, Jill called multiple times, refusing to tell anybody anything, and told one of the technicians to, “SHUT YOUR GOD DAMN MOUTH YOU FAT MOTHER FUCKER!” Eventually Jill figured out that she wasn’t accomplishing anything and stopped calling.
Later that day, Jill called, and whoever answered it immediately passed the phone to me.
“Listen, I don’t know what’s going on, but your techs told me last night I had to speak to you.”
“Yes, Jill, that’s what I told them to tell you.” I said.
“I don’t understand why!” she proclaimed innocently.
“Well, Jill, you were extremely rude to my techs, and they absolutely do not deserve to be treated like that.”
“I’M RUDE? BOY, YOU ARE RUDE! I CAN’T BELIEVE THE WAY YOU’RE TREATING ME!”
“I’m not treating you like anything, but at this point, I’m going to contact MY manager to let him know that we are no longer going to be doing business with you. Good bye.”
I did contact my district manager who forwarded it to the loss prevention guy. The LP guy said only that he didn’t see any threat caused by this woman, but of course, he was wrong.
A couple of days later, I came into work in the morning. Nothing unusual appeared to have happened during the previous evening, until my intern came in.
“Tom, Jill was here last night for 4 hours. Most of the time she sat in the waiting area. At one point she cut in front of everyone in line, and when another customer explained the line to her, Jill screamed, ‘I HOPE YOU GET DIABETES!’ It was awful!”
About a week later, Jill came in to pick up some medications that we had waiting for her. Her bag was put in the wrong drawer, and after some searching the tech found it and rung her up.
“Why did you have trouble finding my bag? Did you give me the wrong medication?” she asked, becoming frantic.
“No, Jill. It was simply put in the wrong drawer. Everything’s OK,” I replied.
“OK, because once you gave me the wrong insulin,” (which we didn’t, I honestly have no idea where this came from), “and I’m a diabetic and it almost killed me.”
“OK, Jill. Goodbye.” Unfortunately, Jill didn’t get my hint that I wanted her to leave the pharmacy. I mean, goodbye is so awfully vague. Not.
Jill then proceeded to the line of customers waiting to pick up their own prescriptions. She had a conversations with each. and. every. single. one. of. them about how we almost killed her. Luckily, not a single one took her for a sane person and dismissed her.
She eventually left the store, and to this date, I haven’t seen nor heard from her again. I heard a rumor that she went to another store in our chain, but I haven’t been able to confirm this.
However, as we all know in the pharmacy, as soon as you think about someone or say their name (Hmm, I haven’t seen so-and-so lately, I wonder where they are?), they come around the corner to screw your day.
Damnit, I’m not looking forward to tomorrow.