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Friday, April 27, 2007

Thanks For Nothing

Customer: "Do you have boric acid?"
Me: "No, I'm sorry, we don't carry that"
Customer: "Well, I think my gerbil has an eye infection. What do you have for that?"
Me: "You know, honestly, I'm really not sure. I'm not trained in gerbil medicine. I would suggest calling a veterinarian"
Customer: "Well thanks for nothing!" (followed by her storming off down aisle 8)

Really? Thanks for nothing? I informed you about our current inventory status, gave an honest answer about my lack of expertise and then offered you guidance on where to go for the best advice. This is why on some level I hate 60 to 70 percent of my customers. I am polite, friendly and helpful and yet you still treat me like i just gave you cancer. I mean seriously, it's a gerbil. I don't know anything about gerbils. If I had a gerbil and it got an eye infection I would think to myself 'Well, it had a good run...I guess if this doesn't clear up on it's own, I'll just buy a mini gerbil eye patch and change his name to Blackbeard' (on an ironic side note, famed pirates Blackbeard and William Kidd once waged a fierce sea battle in an effort to finally settle their long running debate over the virtues of gerbils vs. hamsters). But i digress. The point is, don't go to the pharmacy, get free advice, and then get pissed when that advice isn't what you wanted to hear. Grow up. Act like an adult. Seriously. It's like going to Jiffy Lube and asking how to fix the engine on your lawn mower. Here's a crazy idea, maybe you should just call the store you bought it from. Also, if I could just make another suggestion to customers, don't come in, lift up your shirt to expose your stomach and ask "Is this scabies?". It's only going to make me lift up my shirt and ask "Is this my soul being slowly torn apart?" I'm not a doctor, I'm not a veterinarian, and I'm not a gerbil hater. I'm a pharmacist. Thanks for nothing.

14 comments:

MrHunnybun said...

Good post. Vets are expensive to see in the Uk (and presumably elsewhere) so I often get quetsions along the lines of "what dose of Chlorphenamine can I give my dog", "Can I use Chloramphenicol drops for my parrot".

"You oculd try it but it's at your own risk and it may die, go blind" is the answer I normally use.

Wtf, am I Doctor Doolittle? The only animals I can talk to are my customers. :)

Mc RPh said...

People get mad at me all the time because I won't make recommendations for their animals other than giving them the number to the emergency animal hospital. You may be more than willing to practice hillbilly medicine on your furry friends, but I refuse to be a part of it. Why would I even tell you what isle the sewing kits are in after you just explained that you accidentally stabbed your dog?

Big 'N Tasty RPH said...

I comound for animals but only after they have seen the vet!

vicodinfairy said...

I had a guy ask me for boric acid yesterday...I told him the only thing we had that has boric acid in it was roach poison (seriously, look at the package...it's boric acid.) He got all pissed at me for "messing" with him. News flash: PHARMACIES NO LONGER STOCK BULK BORIC ACID. Whoever told you this was LYING. We also no longer carry "drawing salves"...most of the ingredients in that archaic package you showed me were pulled from the market for being poisonous or carcinogenic. GO AWAY.

Have It My Way RPh said...

Vicodinfairy...all i can say is...AMEN

Dantech said...

What about Icthammol ointment? I thought that was used as a drawing salve.

vicodinfairy said...

Icthamol is still out there, but it's formulation is different than it used to be...the one I get asked the most about is that god awful stuff in the yellow jar with the red lid...name escapes me at this hour...people are so angry when they find out the ingredients aren't the same as they used to be that it actually makes me giggle a bit.

Anonymous said...

See, what they want to do, right, is mix up a little boric acid with, like, maybe some tap water, and put it in their little gerbil's (or in my story, cat's) eye, because that is what they read in the book about animal care they got from the library, likely dated around 1972. Because, you know, that would be really safe and all to stick in a pet's eye.

Actually, we regularly stock a couple of bottles of boric acid (in Ontario, CAN). It's used as an ant killer, I guess.

female RPH said...

I just laughed so hard from reading that I cried. Thank you.

PharmBot2008 said...

My buddy had someone ask if liquid diphenhydramine would work for rat euthanasia.
And who the f*** would put boric acid into an animal's eye???

Anonymous said...

Whoa...I thought I was sleeping during my pet 101 course the first time I had a question like that (I've just graduated)...Would it be that I'm not alone? :P

debbie said...

I am laughing so hard I am crying....thanks for the pick me up!!

Lee Bee said...

Hillbilly medicine....I now have hot coffee in my sinus cavities! I own birds, and I can't count how many times some moron has asked me for "free medical advice" for Polly Parrot who is on her way out.

Not a vet, not a vet tech....

Can't cure stupid!

Anonymous said...

Note to PharmBot2008 ( and others ): Go to a pet store, ask for products to clean pet's eyes, read the ingredients. It is 1% boric acid. It is the same as contact lens eyewash for people.
To Vicodinfairy: boric acid is used on roaches ( at 100% ) and it is not a poison so much as it is a desiccant.