Feeling down? Well drop that bag of Cheetos, get off the couch and get ready to take control! We here at Fast Food Pharma have got a whopper for you!
Be a part of the latest and greatest drug ever created! Have the ability to heal yourself with your mind! Be the life of the party! Feel like a million dollar per episode sitcom king!
Our warlocks are working overtime to crank out our sacred proprietary blend of tiger blood and Adonis DNA. You can be the first to take the greatest drug on the planet: Charlie Sheen! So come on over and start "Winning!". What are you waiting for????
*Charlie Sheen may cause an uncontrollable urge to snort hellacious amounts of cocaine, collect a harem of porn star goddesses, trash hotels, threaten exes, wreck cars, ruin your career, and sporadic bouts of public insanity.
*Limited time offer as production of Charlie Sheen may abruptly stop if PETA ever figures out where we keep the tigers, the Adonis DNA becomes contaminated, or our warlocks die.
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