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Thursday, September 10, 2009

Immunizer

This little ditty goes out to all the pharmacists who were tricked or forced into becoming immunizers by their corporate paymasters.

*Sung to the tune of "Womanizer" by Britney Spears

Superstar, Where you work? How's it going?
You took CPR in case a patient stops breathin'
Hope they brushed their teeth or had a mint or gum or somethin'
But I know what you are, what you are, baby

Look at you not gettin' paid more for this service
Baby, extra work for you my corporate puppet servant
Standing there like you really give a sh*t about this
I know what you are, what you are, baby

Immunizer, immu-immunizer, you're an immunizer
You, you-you are, you, you-you are
Immunizer, immunizer, immunizer
(immunizer)

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You got a needle
(You)
You got Fluvirin
(You)
But I can't do it
(You)
You Immunizer

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You say I'm crazy
(You)
I got your crazy
(You)
You're nothing but a
(You)
You Immunizer

Swine flu, Fluvirin just won't cut it
Too bad for you, cuz the panicked people want it
No extra help with patients out the wazoo, makes it hard, it could be easy
Who you are, that's just who you are, baby

Lollipop, give em out to make it sweeter
It's just a little prick for the victim of the needle
Sure it's cheap, that's just how they want it
But it shouldn't make you sick cuz it's a dead virus, baby

Immunizer, immu-immunizer, you're an immunizer
You, you-you are, you, you-you are
Immunizer, immunizer, immunizer
(immunizer)

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You got a needle
(You)
You got Fluvirin
(You)
But I can't do it
(You)
You Immunizer

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You say I'm crazy
(You)
I got your crazy
(You)
You're nothing but a
(You)
You Immunizer

Get that needle away from me, yeah
(Immunizer, immunizer, immunizer, immunizer)
Got your Epi-pen ready in case I anaphylax
But I won't, cause I eat eggs, yeah!

Immunizer, immu-immunizer, you're an immunizer
You, you-you are, you, you-you are
Immunizer, immunizer, immunizer
(immunizer)

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You got a needle
(You)
You got Fluvirin
(You)
But I can't do it
(You)
You Immunizer

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You)
You say I'm crazy
(You)
I got your crazy
(You)
You're nothing but a
(You)
You Immunizer

Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
Hey don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

Immunizer, Immu-immunizer, you're an immunizer
Oh, immunizer, oh, you're an immunizer baby!

9 comments:

Filet-o-bitch RPh said...

Hey! That's me bitch! lol

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I realized that after the fact. Now I'm supposed to talk people into vaccines and somehow have the time to actually give it too. I'm sure I give the fewest in my entire region, but what are they gonna do? Stop paying me for it! HA! It looks good on a resume when I get the fuck out of Rite Aid.

MomNurseWife said...

That was great! Now I'm going to have this song in my head all day at work. We are pushing the flu vax hard.

Jaded Pharmacist said...

Scary thing is, I was singing "Immunizer" in my head yesterday afternoon while I was walking into work.

I didn't see this post until Sunday morning. Great minds think alike, huh?

pharm said...

That is me too! I feel it annoying not to be reimbursed to do so! Get out of my way just for the sake of ding so!

Anonymous said...

Everyday I feel the evil corporate organ grinder saying "dance, flu shot monkey, dance"

The D-Bag Daily said...

That is tooooo funny! I got a good laugh. Great blog.

Anonymous said...

No company will force me to give injections. I don't give injections to humans...period. I am a pharmacist, not a nurse or physician. The pharmacy schools, the APhA, or the corporations can convince me that immunizations are a part of being a pharmacist.

Anonymous said...

Omg, i just realized i got tricked by corporate into becoming an immunizer but they are crafty alright....somehow they got it into my head that i was doing something big for the pharmacy field as a whole, earning more respect, diversifying our role, etc. etc. But i was easy prey, being a new grad and all, now 2 months in, i have become jaded and now i'm like, how the hell am i giong to have time to give these damn flu shots once we start giving them with all these prescriptions to verfiy not to mention it will be tons busier during season as i have been told!