random haps

One of my favorite things to do when someone calls on the phone to ask "Do I have refills on my hydrocodone?" is to look up their info (so they hear me typing) and then answer quickly "Oh, no." I usually get a squawk of rage- "Yes I do!"- to which my mental reply is "Then why the F&@k did you just ask me? Ask if it's too early, fool."

I kept having people ask me today to repeat things they just told me, or for doctor's offices, to resend requests for PAs. One nurse, when I repeated that we had sent it multiple times, just asked for the info again as if this couldn't possibly be an issue. Rage, I tell you.

One of my customers called to ask me what a doctor had written a script for. She said she was going to spell the drug, and then went "M-A-I-N-S-T-R-E-E-T. What drug is that?"

"Ma'am, I think you spelled Main Street."

"Oh yeah, that's my address."

*headdesk*

She ended up never telling me the drug name- she skimmed the rest, figured out it was her Ambien, that it was too soon to refill and then hung up.

I had a guy get a flu shot, and he asked me to help him with his consent form. Being a soft touch (sometimes) I read him the questions, kinda begrudgingly, until he said, kinda to himself, "I haven't learned to write with the other hand yet, after the stroke."

Of course, then I was perky and helpful.

We have this one office that usually e-scripts nowadays, but sometimes they'll have to call something in. What do I hear when I answer the doctors' line "Hello, this is Hell Pharma, technician speaking?"

"Pharmacist."

No hello, please, thanks or even attempt to be nothing but rude. Seriously, I tell every patient considering switching docs to avoid this office like the plague. I don't see why saying a greeting is taking up precious moments of your day.

January is fast approaching, or as I call it, Pharmacy Apocalypse Month. With the Express Scripts/Walgreens kerfluffle, everyone's going to see shifting people and it's gonna be nutty. I plan to stock up on sweet, sweet rum now.