F*ck You, Hollywood!!!!

It has become a horrifying trend that I go to a theater with great expectations from some creatively edited promo preview that makes me want to watch a movie. So I go to the theater and plunk down a wad of my "I work to satisfy the whims of over privileged douche bags and bow down to the ridiculous demands of my corporate puppet masters" money to buy a ticket then bleed out a kidney to afford a soda and popcorn so I can sit for over 70 minutes to be let down and kicked in the face with your smug "We made this and you suckers paid to watch it" piece of shit movie. The money I spent on the ticket alone would have been put to better use if I wiped my ass with it.

I could have stayed home and watched the television programming that I pay a premium for instead of wasting any money at a theater. You know what's scary, Hollywood? Fighting for your life or your child's life due to cancer, physical therapy after a horrible crippling accident, trying to survive after being severely burned, losing your home because you lost your job, a death of a loved one that literally destroys your outlook on having any shred of happiness ever, growing up not knowing if you will have any food or water for that single day, growing up in a place where things are bombed on a regular basis, the shit I dream about on a daily basis when I am trying to rest, rape, politicians preventing women from having choice or access to birth control, etc.

What I am saying is this: better content, better story lines, better dialog, better cinematography and guaranteed refunds if the movie is a total piece of shit!

That is all.

What Would You Do??

So with the possibility of losing my job I was tossing around ideas of what would I do if I got fired. There are so many things but I go back to an idea some friends and I had in college but with an added twist. I want to share with you and in turn would like you to share with me. Please leave a comment with your dream job or a job you would do if you got fired.

I would use my unemployment time wisely and attend cooking school for baking and pastry. When finished some friends and I are going to open a multipurpose business. It shall be called Dia Betty's. Dia Betty's will specialize in homemade beers in limited edition that will only be available at our bar until they run out or until we decide to stop making that particular beer and change the recipe. The bar part will be open at 5pm for happy hour until last call at 2:30am. After we toss out the drunks and hose down the bar the magic happens in the other part of our facility.

The other part of our facility is a state of the art bakery. We will have a pastry of the day, a bread of the day, and whatever the hell else we feel like baking. We won't do specialty order cakes or any of that crap. It is a first come, first serve this is what we made today deal. When we sell our last baked item the shop is closed so come early or you aren't getting any carb-loaded goodness. If you sleep in your car after last call you might score some sweet sweet pastry before it sells out.

The beauty of Dia Betty's is that everything we serve is unhealthy, super delicious, and there ain't nobody named Betty working there. The hours will be limited as well as the days of the week we are open because the beauty of owning your own business is that you set the hours and the only standards you have to meet are set by the government and not some douche in a suit that has never worked in a retail pharmacy or have any idea what impact limiting medications and one-on-one time with a drug expert has on a human being's quality of life.

Cheers!

Corporate Vision

Sing to the song "Innervision" by System of a Down

I have a job, maybe not long

I'll have to find one, you'll have to find one

We speculate, no one will say

Will I be fired, I cannot see the

Corporate Vision, Corporate Vision

More hours cut, no twenty four

Manager silence, staffers all scared

Some put in notice, already left

Will I be fired, I cannot see the

Corporate Vision, Corporate Vision

We speculate to reinvent the process

New rolls we will play

Giving you drugs, giving advice

Scumbag suits always cut the payroll

Skeleton crew

Suits get more, we get less

Vision

Corporate Vision

Corporate Vision

Corporate Vision

Corporate Vision

Corporate Vision

Manager silence, manager silence

What Sours My Mayonnaise

You know what sours my mayonnaise? When there is a SARAA alert because some dumb ass parent takes their kid out of the hospital after the kid got a kidney transplant with no medications. This isn't like changing batteries in your remote control f*cktard! You can't just swap out the kidneys, stitch 'em up and you're ready to roll.

Let me break it down for you: Each individual has a set of protein markers throughout the body that tell the immune system "This is me." We find a "match" for a patient that has the most protein identification markers on it that are as close to the patient's protein identification markers as possible. Before, during, and after the transplant a patient has to be on drugs that keep the immune system from poking around the new kidneys and saying "Hey, that doesn't belong here so I have to kill it to protect myself!"

When the immune system decides to kill the new kidneys toxins will no longer be filtered out of the body. These toxins build up in the blood stream and are circulated in the blood to poison the rest of the body. Given enough time the rest of the body will shut down such as the liver, the lungs, the brain, the heart, etc. You have essentially put your child into the land of slow painful death.

Congratulations! You're a murderer whose reckless stupidity sours my mayonnaise!

***Update: On a happy note the child turned up at a hospital in a different state. I hope she gets the best of care and her dumb ass parent goes to prison.

Cough Syrup Query

We got an email question from someone wanting a good cough syrup. Unfortunately the best thing over the counter everywhere is Delsym liquid. In some states various brands of guaifenesin/codeine syrup are available by signing a registry. The catch is that chain and big box retailers will not sell them OTC even if the law allows. It reduces insurance and DEA liability to not sell without a prescription. The even better cold/cough liquids like Tussionex and Promethazine/codeine are rx only and controlled substances. Since some douche bag rapper made a song about "drank" which is prometh/codeine as a recreational beverage many physicians are reluctant to write for it. Another option is Tessalon Perles which are rx gel caps that most practitioners will have no issue with prescribing because they won't get you high but they will quiet the cough. There are cough quelling options but sometimes they are hard to come by.

Turnabout Is Fair Play

Long long ago, in a pharmacy not so far away a girl began her career. The hours were normal but the work load was always slamming. She bitched and moaned about being understaffed, overworked, and people just being plain rude. Other pharmacists worked at different retailers where the working was easy and the hassles were minimal.

Now a change in the business brought about by a corporate divorce has worked to her advantage. The chaos has shifted from this girl to the others. No more complaining, less people being rude, her working is now super easy. The others now have 2 hour wait times and no technician help. Oh the sweet sweet irony of the others now being slammed.

She now laughs at the others when she tips her glass. No more drinking because she is bitter now only drinking for sport. Sweet sweet irony...

Welcome 2012

OK so I am a slacker. Well...WAS a slacker. It is a new year and I must write more. We all should. Big N Tasty-this is practically your blog but we have writers so let's all help her out, OK??

So big news! I no longer work retail. I work for a hospital now doing a fun, creative, new project that is going well. More details to follow but here are some observations:

1. Hospital gowns are not fashionable nor do they cover enough of the nether regions. That is TOO bad bc I like fashion (kidding) and I really am NOT used to seeing so many balls and tits just hanging free. Oh well. In a perfect world...

2. Residents may be hot but not all are smart. OMG did you really just send over an order for multi-vit with fluoride for your 92 year old LVAD patient??

3. Nurses are messy but I like it! Plus they are way fun to socialize with. They have some nasty stories. Why did I ask what "code brown" meant?

4. Hospital food isnt so bad after all. I just so happen to work at a place with a natural food store. Amazing!! Plus so many options at the cafeteria-gluten free, curry a day, fish of the day, a mile long salad bar. No excuses for being a fatty if you work there. OH wait! I forgot to mention the pie case...sigh

5. I work at a teaching institution. Fabulous!!

6. Do NOT leave food out in the open in the breakroom. This is free game for nurses, CNA's, etc. They will gobble it up in no time.

7. Patients are just as demanding in their private room as they are in public. That is OK bc I am no longer ringing up their KY jelly, handheld mirror and a bar of soap (yes-that was a real purchase I rang up years ago) nor listening to their whining about multiple non-pharmacy related BS.

8. I miss my vacation days!! I have to accumulate them now. OMG their goes my 21 days in Spain!! sigh...you must wait you young, handsome Spanish men. I will arrive some day!

9. I still dispense meds just not 350 a day. I spend a lot more time being a pharmacist now. so strange...but SO good.

10. NO MORE THIRD PARTY ISSUES!! yippee!!! pee in my Myla panties!!

Please don't get me wrong-I liked, at times, being a retail pharmacist and they are some of the smartest people I know. I just had a tough time with my retailer cutting things left and right and people's jobs were dropping like flies and I just felt like a zombie after work somedays. This is refreshing change but the lure of more vacation time and sick days pulls at me. I just wish I could do a more hybrid job or win the lottery! LOL

Happy belated New Year to all of our LOVELY readers, especially the methadone crackheads that are still sending me love/HATE letters. You all rule too!

love,

Filet