We bring the FAST and laughs to pharmacy.
Monday, November 14, 2011
random haps
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Glucose Testing
Sunday, September 11, 2011
I Foresee A Misadventure
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Let's Talk About Sex
Oh No She Didn't!
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Clash of the Titans
Saturday, July 23, 2011
...And Then I Don't Feel So Bad...
Thursday, July 21, 2011
**DISCLAIMER**
Friday, July 8, 2011
Crashin Your Party
Keep up the good work Florida and hopefully other states will follow your lead!
Saturday, June 11, 2011
It's About Damn Time!!!
Friday, June 10, 2011
I Hate F*#%ing Coupons
Saturday, June 4, 2011
If It Ain't Broke Don't Fix It
Monday, May 30, 2011
SCARY as HELL
http://drugtopics.modernmedicine.com/drugtopics/Modern+Medicine+Now/The-4-second-Rx-review-Who-benefits/ArticleStandard/Article/detail/716700
Drug Topics
Friday, May 27, 2011
In Case You Wondered What I Want For My Birthday...
** Severed head of patron saint of genital disease goes on sale **
The severed head of the patron saint of genital disease goes on sale in County Meath
< http://www.bbc.co.uk/go/em/fr/
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
I Threw Them Away
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Everything Is Better With Bacon
Monday, May 16, 2011
Existential Dilemma
When her father went through his fight against heart disease and diabetes she watched him go through multiple doctor appointments, surgeries, and medications. He had heart bypasses, arterial plaque removals, and 2 strokes. The strokes left him unable to use the right side of his body without severe difficulty and a lot of physical therapy. He died in his sleep in his mid seventies from a ruptured aneurysm.
Her mother had a long hard fight with COPD that resulted in oxygen use, multiple daily breathing treatments, a ton of medications, a ton of doctor appointments, lung cancer, and eventually an untreatable brain tumor that finally killed her in her early eighties.
My mom died in her sleep from a ruptured aneurysm at the age of 61, peacefully, with eyes closed and no suffering to the great beyond. This leads to my dilemma. For all the good we think we do with surgical intervention, medications, and other therapies are we just making death painful and prolonged? Aren't we all supposed to go peacefully in our sleep instead of kicking and screaming to the very end?
How can I look at people and tell them the statistics and what to expect from treatments when all I want to say is that you will have many more years to suffer before you die a painful death? The healthcare industry is the patron saint of sadism that promises eternal life and wonderous results but only succeeds in torturing those who seek salvation and are willing to pay any price for any small glimmer of hope. It has become what snake oil salesman have preyed upon for years except now we take your money, give you the tonic, and poke you with a stick repeatedly until you finally die. I love modern society!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
From the Makers of "Fukitol"
You know I had to pick this up for my MIL.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Sad times
Thank you,
Filet
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Lap Apron
Hanging out below your muffin top.
Creating friction and moisture for a minutiae of beast
Such as bacteria, fungus, and the opportunistic yeast.
I'm not talking about something worn when serving a patron
I'm talking about the voluminous reach of a skin fold lap apron.
For many aged* it's from caloric expansion with tonicity lost
For others the result of surgery/dieting with rapid weight loss.
Whatever the cause of your lap apron may be
Hygiene is important, keep it dry you see.
If your lap apron becomes a prohibitive part of your anatomy
Find a good surgeon who can perform a panniculectomy.
With a lap apron surgically and maybe permanently gone
We can begin to rip off the 30 Rock "Muffin Top" song.
*pronounced age-ed for the purpose of flow
Friday, April 15, 2011
Very Important
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Allergy Wars
Another great thing is a vaccine for cat dander/hair allergies currently in study. Just think if we can finally get a vaccine for cat allergies then we could adapt that vaccine for dog dander/hair, bird feathers, etc. The reign of pet allergies could be coming to an end in the next 5 years or so. I'm stoked! No more will I be unable to breathe and have to blow my nose a million times after my cat decided my pillow was an awesome sleeping place. No more will people have to shun goose down pillows and bedding. People won't have an excuse not to adopt pets from shelters because we will no longer be allergic to them. No more ads on Craig's list that we need to rehome a dog/cat because the child is allergic. A brave new world of pet ownership will prevail!
The future will be awesome!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Changing My Name To Captain Obvious
To my keen sense of observation I am going with bowel obstruction. Looked at the rx and sure enough it was a laxative and pain med combo. The most likely reason: low fiber diet and not enough exercise or water.
Late one night a lady comes in with an emergency room rx for Fiorinal with codeine for migraines. When she checks out I just shake my head and wonder how long she has suffered. She buys 3 Hostess honey buns, 2 bags of Cheetos Puffs, 4 packs of salted sunflower seeds, and 2 Mountain Dews. It doesn't take a genius to see that she eats minimally nutritional things chock full of preservatives, color/flavor additives, and salt. All of these things can contribute to migraines.
She also had no previous history of any other medications except for Fiorinal with codeine to try and prevent migraine episodes so I made some suggestions to make her life easier but she didn't care because Medicaid will give her as many ER visits and Fiorinal with codeine as her little heart desires instead of her actually going to a physician and trying something daily to cut back on her discomfort.
Ugh, some people never learn...
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Flounce Like You MEAN It!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Rush Job
***Tote of refrigerated items first*** This has nothing to do with how much or how little is in the tote, it has to do with drug stability.
***Miscellaneous small boxes of syringes, test strips, etc that come separate from the totes*** These are annoying, small, and the whole box of stuff goes in one spot on the shelf.
***Now the other totes***
1. Oversized items (bowel prep jugs, boxes of syringes, 500-1000 count bottles, pound jars of ointments, large liquid bottles, Spiriva, Advair, etc.)
2. Boxed items (anything in a box like eye drops, ointments, nasal sprays, inhalers, etc)
3. Any other liquids and recons.
4. square/rectangular/odd shaped stock bottles
5. round stock bottles
It helps to pull all the items of each step and group same drugs together then put them on the shelf before going to the next step. In a situation with two people have one person set them up while the other person puts them away and that massive mountain of drugs will be put away in not time flat!
Friday, March 18, 2011
Sleepy, Not Sleepy
I have several patients questioning the potency of your 10mg zolpidem tablets. One lady even took one and 1/2 tablets and still was wide awake 3 hours later. I had the pleasure of her multiple phone calls. Please take a few tablets and sample their actual active ingredient concentration to appease the doubters.
Thank you!
BNT RPH
Nuclear Meltdown
Calling the pharmacy and stopping by the pharmacy will not get you potassium iodide tablets. I do not know what you have heard on the news or read on the internet but potassium iodide will not save you from radiation poisoning. I repeat: Potassium Iodide Tablets Will NOT Save You From Radiation Poisoning!
Potassium iodide is only used to protect the thyroid gland. It does not protect anything else on or in you from radiation and its detrimental effects. In severe cases it will not even be enough to protect the thyroid gland so get over it.
The US government has stated that we (in the US) are in no danger from any radiation coming from Japan. However, there can be environmental consequences that would have widespread ramifications mainly involving sea life, shore life, and water supply contamination.
There is no point in getting yourself worked up over any potential nuclear meltdown. Let's not get all "Lord of the Flies" just yet. If it happens, it happens. We as a planet will deal with the consequences.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
I Want A New Drug!
Be a part of the latest and greatest drug ever created! Have the ability to heal yourself with your mind! Be the life of the party! Feel like a million dollar per episode sitcom king!
Our warlocks are working overtime to crank out our sacred proprietary blend of tiger blood and Adonis DNA. You can be the first to take the greatest drug on the planet: Charlie Sheen! So come on over and start "Winning!". What are you waiting for????
*Charlie Sheen may cause an uncontrollable urge to snort hellacious amounts of cocaine, collect a harem of porn star goddesses, trash hotels, threaten exes, wreck cars, ruin your career, and sporadic bouts of public insanity.
*Limited time offer as production of Charlie Sheen may abruptly stop if PETA ever figures out where we keep the tigers, the Adonis DNA becomes contaminated, or our warlocks die.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Speaking Of Fever
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Bieber Fever
Friday, March 4, 2011
A Case Of The Frownies
Friday, February 18, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Showing Some Love
With all departments' hourly employee cuts and a push for new services given by already overburdened pharmacists it is a wonder that all employees have not walked out. You would have an easier time getting fluffed (I mean frisked) by the TSA, flying to California and having a celebrity lick cocaine out of your butthole than waiting for a pharmacist to check your blood pressure/blood sugar/cholesterol/give a flu shot while attempting to get all their other work done (doctor calls, patient calls, consultations, data/product verification, insurance audits, drug orders, babysitting unqualified/undertrained managers working as technicians,etc) and the other 20 people waiting for the same services ahead of you. I have been told by several pharmacists that patients have walked out because their wait times were unacceptably long (meaning more than 5 minutes because we are an impatient society) and that people are unwilling to pay to have blood sugar/cholesterol measurements taken. They were mistakenly under the impression that those services were being offered for free like the blood pressure screenings for Feb, which patients are now going to expect 24/7 and all of these services are covered at their primary physician visit with one small copay versus multiple copays for different services at the pharmacy. What genius(s) came up with these programs? Maybe you should punch that one (those) in the face(s)...
Other complaints I have heard that are not being addressed by The Suits:
* Unfairness in holiday scheduling.
* The Suits use their blogs to blow smoke up the employees' asses and don't ever directly address ANY issue.
* The store brand Big Flats beer is terrible (watch YouTube reviews and Stephen Colbert's Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger segment that starts out talking about British Superman)...Hopefully the wine won't be as bad...
* All employees are treated like thieves under prison guard while at work.
* Having staff meetings when there is not enough staff to bother having a meeting.
* Floater pharmacists feel like they are treated like refugees/thieves/terrorists in every store they work at.
* Super low employee morale.
* Any questions to pharmacy supervisors are met with a standardized "yes man" corporate response.
* Assistant managers are treated like overpaid stock boys.
* Most stores don't have the hours to keep a cosmetician on duty, which is the highest and usually most expensive theft area.
* Under no circumstances is overtime pay okay in any department, even if you are left with only an assistant manager to play cashier.
* Not enough employee hours to properly train new employees in any department.
* Too many/too high performance goals for all departments working with a skeleton crew.
* The inability to meet the needs of all patients/customers due to all aforementioned factors.
* A deep sense of failure at not being able to meet every patient/customer need like they could in the old days.
* Complaints of record profit, execs taking huge salaries/bonuses, but employee retirement match considered too low compared to exec perks.
* Now touted as a "family of healthcare companies" but employees get the shaft when it comes to their healthcare plans and complaints that deductibles/copays are way too high for a healthcare company to justify.
The Suits may not be listening but the bloggers are. I hear others in your situations say "Be happy you have a job in this economy" but the truth is that you could hire on at a direct competitor that may or may not give you the satisfaction you are looking for. There are other job options in retail and non-retail for everyone. All you have to do is look around to see what is available and what you are qualified for. You must choose your path in this life and know that I admire each and every one of you that works like a chicken with it's head cut off because you are the backbone of the corporate machine, whether they appreciate all you do or not.
I am sure that Chuck Sr. is rolling in his grave. McDruggie's used to be a company about the people. I leave you all in the hopes that your corporate paymasters realize what a grave mistake they have made and make a 180 degree turn and come back to the roots of what this corporation stood for: the people!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Pray For Me
Which made me wonder why she was unbothered by a repeat of festering stinky baby gutter when there are are things far worse than chlamydia that can go symptomless for months or years before you even know there is a problem. Things like human papilloma virus (HPV) that can lead to genital warts, polyps, and cancer. Things like herpes that can infect the eyes, genitals, mouth, and cause blindness to babies during pregnancy (if untreated and in a small percentage of those being treated). Things like human immunodeficiency virus that leave you susceptible to several types of cancer, bacterial infection, fungal infection, viral infection, and horrible side effects from the medications that try to treat it, not to mention how much harder it is to treat the longer it has had to replicate in the body unchecked.
I had another guy who came in for a VD antibiotic and he seemed a bit more concerned and said "I am a nurse, I should know better than this but stuff happens." I chatted with him for a long time and somewhere along the lines church was mentioned so he asked me to pray for him. I don't think prayer is going to clear up your infection otherwise I know a whole bunch of AIDS patients who should be cured but alas religion has failed and chemical science has only fared a smidge better.
The point of all this is: Beyond saving you an embarrassing trip to the doc and the pharmacy for venereal disease, because yes I laugh at each and every unfortunate motherf*cker that comes in for venereal disease after they have left the pharmacy, condoms will save you from most of the horrible and currently impossible to cure sexually transmitted diseases. USE CONDOMS!!!! You can even get them for free from Planned Parenthood and other sexual awareness promoters.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Take It To The Limit
Sing to "Take It To The Limit" by the Eagles
All alone at the end of the evening
Any my meth high crash is leaving me blue
I was thinking about another
Methamphetamine high, but I was out
You know i really need a picture ID
(Still getting the run around)
So I'll steal identities
(Need more ephedrine)
But meth is all I need
Keep on turning out and burning out
And turning out the same
So put me on a highway
And find a drugstore
And take it to the limit one more time
You can sell meth to make easy money
You can take meth to be high all the time
If it all fell to pieces tomorrow
Would I do jail time?
And when you're looking for Sudafed
(Pharmacists don't care)
And you can't buy no more
(Can't buy it anywhere)
When there's nothing to get high on
Still you're coming back, you're running back
You're coming back for more
So put me on a highway
And find a drugstore
And take it to the limit one more time
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
One more time
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
One more time
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
Take it to the limit
One more time
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
What Melts My Cheese
It gets better. It wasn't just one patient that I returned a clinic prescription to stock, it was seventeen different patients. Some of them with multiple prescriptions. Only one patient's prescription wasn't covered on insurance. You got to be f*cking kidding me! This is why many people just don't deserve health insurance while the ones who sorely need it and would pick up and take their medications can't afford it. Stupid f*cking American medical sytem! Stupid f*cking ungrateful/irresponsible people! That doesn't just melt my cheese, it smoked the shit out of it!
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Extremely Limited Offer
Friday, January 14, 2011
Why States' Medicaid/Social Services Are Going Broke
Friday, January 7, 2011
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
Things I Won't Miss by Anonymous
*People walking up to the counter and shouting hello as though they've been waiting forever even though they JUST walked up to the counter and have barely been there for more than 12 nanoseconds.
*Running around like a crazy person from station to station because either (a) there's no one here or (b) because the people that are here are slow.
*The phone. Oh that f*cking phone.
*The customers. Should I name drop because I really f*cking want to.
*The words "I need a refill." or "I don't have the bottle." or "It says I have four refills until July 2011."
*Customers coming up to the CLOSED drop off window and completely ignoring and sometimes pushing aside the HUGE red sign that says "Proceed to Pickup Window" and then looking at me like I'm crazy when I tell them it's closed.
*Dirty prescriptions that seem as though they've been raped and shat on by homeless people. Is it so difficult to keep that piece of paper from becoming a victim of sodomy?
*The f*cking phone.
*Working the drop off window and having to deal with questions like "Where's the ice?", "Do you sell toenail clippers?" "Where are the pencils?", "I'm looking for lotion?". Not a f*cking customer service window and I obviously don't work the f*cking floor so how the f*ck would I know where icy toenail lotion pencils would be?
*This dusty ass allergen trap called a pharmacy. This is the health industry?
*Scrubs. Actually won't miss those because I never put those sleep bags on. And I was also under the impression that wearing pajamas to work was against the dress code.
*The drive thru. Everything about it. Every. Single. Thing. Deserves its own separate list.
*People that smell like bathrooms. People that smell like four month old sweaty cheese. People that smell like they've never heard of showers. People that smell like dead kittens soaked in vodka stuffed in a moldy barrel inside the asshole of the Loch Ness Monster.
*That f*cking drive thru bell and that fucking drive thru buzzer. And I realize I said that the drive thru deserves its own list which is totally true but when the hell am I ever gonna write that list?
*People that drive up with their f*cking arms/canes/tree branches/artificial limbs hanging out of the window so that they can press that damned button before they even park their fucking cars.
*Speaking of cars, if you come through the drive thru and your f*cking car door/window/trunk/sunroof does not open and the only way you can communicate is by getting out of your car then why the f*ck didn't you just come inside?
*People that don't hand you the money or toss the money or put the money on the counter five f*cking feet from where I am (I'm over here at THIS register, you f*cking douche)
*Some of those f*cking slow as shit nurses. It doesn't matter which one. I've offended them all just by saying this.
*People that ask "How are you?" Like you f*cking care.
*Broken printers/scales/computers/people. Yeah this can happen anywhere but I won't miss it happening here.
*Old people who call in prescriptions because they are afraid of technology then take up most of whatever is left of their life reading you one prescription number off the bottle. That is IF they can read it. "Oh wait, I'm sorry baby, that was a six." AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!
*People telling me how I should do my job. "You guys would be a lot faster if you did this." "It would be easier for the customer if you did that." Well, I don't come to your house and tell you how to beat your kids, watch TV, make meth and be a worthless asshole so stop telling me how to do my job.
*Old people in general. Just because you're old doesn't mean you can walk all over me like something that old people walk on. Orthopedic shoes perhaps? Eh, whatever. Old people blow with a few exceptions (you know who you are).
*People who live on their f*cking cell phones and refuse to get off them even in the midst of physical interactions with people standing right in front of them. "Sir, I realize that Rochelle shouldn't have done that to Kenny and that you need to get to the grocery store before they run out of peaches which by the way I really don't see happening but I need your address."
*The approach. You're at the counter, you're at the window, even drive thru and you see someone approaching and you pray to God they are not coming to bother you. But they always are.
*The question "Can I pay for this stuff back here?" even though you've already emptied your one hundred plus items on the counter.
*Questions. I hate questions now. They say there are no dumb ones but I can without a shadow of a doubt tell you that there are. "What should I do about dry lips?" Really??
*Those severely f*cked up names that not even Dan Brown himself could decipher. And I'm the one that gets crazy looks when I can't say them. "And what is....uhm...Kuh-taw-buh-tee-air-eesh-ma-jah's birthday?" "It's pronounced Elizabeth!"
*Smart counts. I will not miss those and they will not miss me because I think they are assholes and they think I'm black. Telxons are some racist sons of b*tches.
*Screaming and crying banshee children that only know how to cough and sneeze on every open surface and annoy the shit out of me. Yeah, this place makes me want to cry too but do you see me acting like that?
*Pharmacists with big heads. Usually the fresh out of school pill jockeys who think they're better than the people to their left. Get off your fucking high horse and ring out that lady's pantyhose.
*People who pull money out of their bras/shoes/underwear/rectums and then expect me to handle it, F*ck no! Go learn what the f*ck hygiene means and make it you life's purpose.
*Medicaid patients who complain about having to pay 50 cents to two bucks for their prescriptions but will pay any amount of money for a cheeseburger or a candy bar or whatever other f*cking pointless thing they don't need.
*When I tell you that something will be ready, for instance, after 4. Don't ask me when it's going to be ready and don't try to argue with me about the time I gave you either. "Does it mean 4:15, 4:30, 4:45???" Shut the f*ck up you dumb motherf*cker because I just told you that it will be after four so I don't give two f*cks about what time after 4 you come because it will either be done or it won't be which is another thing I couldn't give two f*cks about so go f*ck your f*cking self, bitch.
*It says Drop Off Window not Consultation Window, so why the f*ck are you in my face asking me what you should put on your rash?
*Benzonatate. A minor gripe but I will not miss your roly poly ass.
*Lazy motherf*ckers. You know who you are.
*Awesome motherf*ckers. You know who you are.
*In between motherf*ckers. Well, actually, you can only fall into one of the two groups above so, yeah, you know who you are.
*Wal-Act junkies. Vicodin junkies. Morphine junkies. Insulin junkies (those exist, right?). Junkies of all shapes and sizes.
Things are coming to a close around here so I leave you with these wise words of one Oliver Humperdinck, renowned author and indoor trumpeteer. "If any man hath his hands, he beateth with them slow time around the bolly bop tree when the weather is green and cheese is in bloom."
Powerful stuff.
Peace, bitches.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Open Letter To The FDA
An extreme case I had was a lady who goes to a different emergency room every 3 or four days to get a prescription for Ultram. It is usually written with a muscle relaxer and naproxen. She always only fills the Ultram. On this particular evening her newest emergency prescription was one day too early for insurance to cover it. It is out policy to never fill pain pills early if the insurance company denies the claim. Our computer systems do not process next day insurance claims until after 3am. She sat in the pharmacy with 3 young children, one in diapers for 3 hours before the youngest kept screaming and fussing because it was way past bedtime for young children. She finally left the pharmacy at 12am with her children when she had planned to stay until she could get her pills as soon as possible because she was getting fidgety and cranky.
Please re-evaluate Ultram for its potential for abuse and addiction. At the least give it a Schedule V so we can try to prevent some of this personal and child abuse.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Big N Tasty RPh
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
One to One
There is a lack of awareness for patients that significant weight loss will make major decreases in your blood pressure. This is especially important to know if you are on a blood pressure medication. As your weight and blood pressure goes down you will need to communicate with your physician and monitor your blood pressure. When blood pressure goes too low there can be complications far worse than falling down or passing out when standing up from a sitting position. Imagine if this happened while you were working with dangerous machinery or driving a 2000lb death machine, I mean automobile. Imagine if it dropped so low that you died from a chamber of the heart collapsing or got brain damage from lack of blood oxygenating the brain....crap, gonna get hate mail for that alarmist comment...
Reliable studies over several years have proven one significant finding in weight loss:
1kg = 1mmHg
For every 1 kilogram (2.2 pounds) of weight lost your blood pressure will drop approximately 1mmHg or one point on your reading. This correlation means that patients can see measurable results with only a 10 pound weight loss. As weight and blood pressure drop your blood pressure medications will need to be adjusted. Patients on multiple drug therapy can be dropped to single drug therapy and patients on single drug therapy can have their dose reduced. With enough weight loss and a good weight maintenance lifestyle change most patients can be MEDICATION FREE!
The added bonus: with significant weight loss in Type 2 diabetics we also see less insulin resistance and better beta cell function, which allows them to get off insulin and reduce their other medications and in many patients the same MEDICATION FREE status is achievable!
Another added bonus: with significant weight loss and better eating habits the same reductions can be seen in LDL and triglycerides with increases in HDL (the good cholesterol) and the same MEDICATION FREE status can be achieved by most cholesterol patients!
Long gone will be the days of patients bitching and moaning about taking multiple drugs and spending a lot on ever-climbing copays! Oh wait, reality check, this America... The land of high fructose corn syrup, ever present salty & sugary snacks, and a drive thru eatery on every other street corner! Optimism, I lay thee to rest. Say high to Jesus and Budda for me! I hear they throw great parties, I mean seriously, water into wine...How awesome is that?!
Please let your patients know the wonderful benefits of weight loss and healthy eating. Please let them know how to properly monitor their blood pressure at home at least on a weekly basis with any dietary and workout combo so they know to contact you when they are probably going to need that medication change to prevent any complications. And please only use optimism for them because making those changes should be done slowly and permanently. Slow and steady always finishes the race!